[Chatting] The husband's violence is getting worse..."Will child abuse, domestic violence, and divorce be the reason?"

□ Broadcast date and time: November 25, 2024 (Mon)
□ Host: Attorney Jo In-seop
□ Cast: Attorney Ryu Hyun-joo

* The text below may differ from the actual broadcast content, so please check the broadcast for more accurate information.


□ DEAR READER: My husband has been a civil servant for a long time and has been known as a decent and decent person in the workplace and among acquaintances. I'm just as good as I was in a relationship, but it was an exception for my son. The husband put too much strict and high standards on his son. If his son did not meet that standard, he was fiercely disciplined, but he often punished him with corporal punishment. After my son entered high school, he grew bigger and began to rebel against his husband when he came to puberty. My husband and son bumped into each other on every occasion, and when I sided with him, he started talking tough to me. Then a month ago... Something that I was concerned about happened. On this day, my husband tried to punish me for not getting good grades, but my son refused to get hit. Then, the husband became extremely excited and beat his son with his hands and feet. I tried to stop him from the side, but it wasn't enough. The son, who had been beaten for a long time, managed to escape from his husband and ran out of the house, and went to the police station along the way to report him. My husband is currently under police investigation for child abuse and domestic violence. My son said he could no longer live with his father and said he would cut ties with me if he didn't divorce him. I'm scared to live with my husband because he seems to be getting so violent. I want to divorce my husband and live with my son, can I divorce him?

◇ Lawyer Cho In-seop (hereinafter referred to as Cho In-seop): Can we divorce our children because of domestic violence against them, not their spouse?

◆ Lawyer Ryu Hyun-joo (hereinafter referred to as Ryu Hyun-joo): First of all, our law sets six reasons for divorce in court, but it does not set unfair treatment of children as direct reasons for divorce. This is in contrast to the fact that direct descendants, such as parents and grandparents, are directly defined as reasons for divorce when they are unfairly treated by their spouse. However, depending on the specific issue, domestic violence against children may also fall under Article 840 No. 6 of the Civil Code for "other serious reasons for difficulty in continuing marriage." In the case of you, I think the punishment of the husband's son is so serious that he is criminally punished. And this corporal punishment has been going on for years, and I think there must have been a lot of conflict with you in the process. At this rate, it could be determined that there is a serious reason why it would be difficult for the husband to continue the marriage, even if he did not directly assault you.

◇ Cho In-seop: My son must be a high school student. I'm about to become a college student, is there a way to get subsidized for my adult son's college tuition, living expenses, etc. if you get divorced?

◆ Ryu Hyun-joo: It is legally only 'nursing expenses' that you can receive financial assistance for your children after your divorce. However, since child support refers to the amount of money paid to caregivers by non-custodial children under the age of 19, there is no legal justification for financial assistance if the child comes of age. However, in reality, it costs the most money after your child enters university or when you get married. So, in divorce proceedings, some of these are considered and financially divided. For example, when calculating the property division ratio, not only does it contribute to property formation, but it also takes into account future supportive circumstances. In addition, if a case is resolved through mediation rather than a divorce ruling, the parties may agree and additionally state in the mediation report, such as "We shall pay 1/2 of the college tuition for our children" and "We shall pay for our children's wedding."

◇ Cho In-seop: If after filing a lawsuit, the husband is showing remorse. You want to give it another chance, but you're afraid the same problem will repeat itself. Is there anything I can get help from the court at this time?

◆ Ryu Hyun-joo: Yes. If so, you'll be worried a lot. Unlike ordinary civil lawsuits, divorce lawsuits are based on family problems and are lawsuits that can cause major changes in status relationships, so we do not judge them only in writing and evidence. In the middle, the court intervenes in guardianship and takes various mediation measures, and among them, there are procedures for counseling from professional psychological counselors, such as marital counseling or family counseling. The cost is paid by the state. If your husband is showing remorse after receiving a divorce complaint, why don't you use this counseling process? Your husband will also have the opportunity to reflect on himself through professional counseling, and you will have the opportunity to watch how he conducts counseling and consider whether there is room for improvement. Above all, psychological examinations and counseling for the son who is the victim of the assault need to be conducted, and I think the most important thing is whether he can forgive and accept his father. In this case, it is possible to proceed in the form of family counseling including children.

◇ Jo In-seop: If the mediation is not established once and proceeding to litigation, is it no longer possible to adjust?

◆ Ryu Hyun-joo: First of all, the procedure of 'adjusted prepositionalism' applies to divorce proceedings. In other words, mediation must go through at least once during the proceedings. In addition to divorce proceedings, mediation prepositionalism is usually applied in the case of family-to-family proceedings such as inheritance proceedings. However, there is not only one opportunity to adjust. In some cases, you can make several adjustments. Even if the mediation was not established at the beginning of the lawsuit, there may be a possibility of mediation again as the lawsuit proceeds, or if the difference in position was not so large at the time of mediation, the mediation date may be continued and re-negotiated.

◇ Cho In-seop: If you file for divorce once and then drop it, can you file for divorce again for the same reason?

◆ Ryu Hyun-joo: Under the Civil Procedure Act, there is a 'principle of prohibition of litigation' that the same lawsuit cannot be filed if the lawsuit is withdrawn after the final judgment on a case has been made. In other words, if you withdraw your lawsuit during the appeal trial after receiving the first trial ruling, or if you withdraw your lawsuit during the Supreme Court hearing after receiving the appeal trial, you cannot file a lawsuit again for the same reason. Since the Civil Procedure Act also applies to domestic litigation, it may be difficult to file for divorce again for the same reason if the lawsuit is withdrawn during the trial of the first trial in divorce proceedings. And, in some cases of divorce by trial, there is a limit on the filing period of June from the date of notification and two years from the date of occurrence, so you should be careful. However, even after withdrawing the lawsuit, if the problem that occurred before that is repeated or if a new reason for liability is found, it is of course possible to file a divorce lawsuit again.

◇ Jo In-seop: Now, to summarize what we've done so far... If the husband's punishment against his son is serious, it could be a reason for divorce. After the divorce, you cannot receive support for your adult child's college tuition or living expenses, but you can specify financial support when you divide your property. If your husband shows remorse, it is recommended to use marital counseling or family counseling provided by the court. Even after the mediation has not been established, you can try to make it again during the divorce proceedings. Once you drop your divorce, you can't file again for the same reason, and you can file for divorce again if the pre-litigation issue repeats or new liability reasons are found. So far, I've been with lawyer Ryu Hyun-joo.

◆ Ryu Hyun-joo: Thank you.

◇ Cho In-seop: You can listen to <Attorney Cho In-seop's Counseling Office> again on YouTube. If you have any questions or suggestions, please comment.