[Chatting] My husband who strangled me when I notified him of "divorce after bullying my mother-in-law"..."I'm going to set fire to my friendship".

□ Broadcast date and time: December 31, 2024 (Tue)
□ Host: Attorney Jo In-seop
□ Starter: Attorney Woo Jin-seo

* The text below may differ from the actual broadcast content, so please check the broadcast for more accurate information.

◆ Jo In-seop: Rohouse for you. I'm with lawyer Woo Jin-seo. Hello.

◇ Woo Jin-seo: Hello, I'm Woo Jin-seo, lawyer of Shinsegae Law Firm.

◆ Jo In-seop: Let's first talk about what kind of concerns you have if you come to the counseling center today.

■ DEAR READER: My husband and I married in three months and we ended our marriage. The reason was my relationship with my mother-in-law. My mother-in-law didn't like me from the first time we met. He said to his face that his son is a professional, but you are a general office worker, and that he took on a daughter-in-law who has no decent job. I told my husband about this and he told me to hold it in until I finished my wedding. After the wedding, he promised that he would take responsibility and not run into his mother. I only believed that and got married. But it hasn't changed since we got married. My mother-in-law called me often and scolded me for not reporting on my husband's status. Not only that, but I started by not having a proper coma, and I often verbally abused my husband, saying, "I know what your mother is like when I see you." I told my husband it was hard to talk to my mother on the phone, but he was just complaining, so I told him why. I told my husband that I don't think I can be married anymore. Then my husband suddenly got angry and slapped me in the face, then strangled me, saying he was talking about divorce easily. I managed to get out of my husband's hands and go to my house. My husband told me and my parents if I don't come home, I'll set my house on fire. He is threatening by sending a text message saying, "Be careful while walking on the street. If you encounter it, I will stab you with a knife." My parents and I are scared and struggling. Can I get alimony against my husband and mother-in-law while filing for divorce?

◆ Jo In-seop: Lawyer Jo In-seop's counseling center. It was a sad story. But I think the couple started because of their mother-in-law. Is it possible to get a divorce because of the reason for the divorce but not the husband's mother-in-law?

◇ Yes, it's possible. The civil law stipulates six reasons for divorce in court. One of them is the spouse or its immediate subordinate, so to put it simply, from the perspective of your in-laws and your husband, you will be your father-in-law's mother-in-law. It stipulates that it is when he was unfairly treated, so if unfair treatment such as abuse, assault, or insult occurs, you can seek a divorce on the grounds of him.

◆ Cho In-seop: Yes, in the past, only conflicts between high-income families were a problem, but hasn't the number of cases of receiving help from parents for housework and raising children increased significantly recently? In addition, conflicts between books and books have increased a lot. In fact, it doesn't seem easy to coordinate between parents and spouses like this. Perhaps because they have different environments, they often encounter each other, but in this case, it is difficult to make it a reason for divorce in court just because of a simple disagreement.

◇ Woo Jin-seo: Yes, if it's simply a difference of opinion, I think it's necessary to coordinate the difference of opinion through dialogue. Therefore, simply having a quarrel or two with words and actions does not seem to be a significant reason. However, if the same content has been repeatedly reversed several times, or if it is proven to be violent, it could be a reason for divorce.

◆ Cho In-seop: How do you see it in your case?

◇ Woo Jin-seo: Yes, among the lower court precedents, it seems that they are now judging by looking at the circumstances and circumstances, such as whether they were severely criticized for a coma, or they were caught actively covering up with their children after knowing that they were having an affair.

◆ Cho In-seop: Yes, we need to secure objective data. In the case of my mother-in-law, I think she now verbally abused her over the phone. If so, I think recording a phone call can be a little helpful now in the case of securing objective evidence. In most cases, you claim alimony from a liable spouse, and in this case, you can claim alimony from your husband as well as your mother-in-law while filing for divorce.

◇ Woo Jin-seo: If your fault is recognized, your mother-in-law can also claim alimony by holding you responsible for the breakdown of your marriage. However, it may be less than what you generally think.

◆ Jo In-seop: Usually, about 10 million won for alimony to the other parent, right?

◇ Yes, there is a high possibility that it will be less than that. Most of the time, she's hurt a lot by her mother-in-law's words and actions, but she says a lot that the most painful thing now is her husband pretending not to know or just sitting on the sidelines. Many people say that the attitude of not being able to mediate, saying, "It's mainly because you're an old person, just let it go this time, is more hurtful." In general, the court also seems to think that the husband's attitude is more wrong, considering that most of the cases where a lawsuit is filed with his husband and mother-in-law as co-defendants.

◆ [Jo In-seop] Yes, now the couple are married. The couple's responsibility is the biggest, and the parents' responsibility is probably secondary. But if you look at the story, my husband did something wrong. But in the meantime, he said he continues to send text messages that are close to threatening not only to the sender but also to your parents. If my husband continues to send threatening texts like this after the lawsuit is filed, can't we ask him to reflect this in the alimony?

◇ Woo Jin-seo: Yes, since it was originally a claim for alimony due to divorce, the reason for filing for divorce is usually the right to claim damages for mental suffering. If a year from the occurrence of the individual liability to the final divorce is identified as an illegal act as a whole, the amount of alimony can be affected even if it is an act after the lawsuit is filed. In this case, I think you will file for divorce due to your mother-in-law's verbal abuse and husband's assault. Since then, while your husband continues to send threatening texts to his parents, such as setting them on fire if they don't return home, I think it can be seen as a series of acts, so I can argue that the alimony amount should be calculated.

◆ Cho In-seop: Yes, but is there a way to prevent being threatened like this other than receiving alimony?

◇ Woo Jin-seo: Yes, first of all, continuing to make threats by text may now constitute a violation of the Act on the Use and Promotion of Information and Communication Network. It may be possible to proceed with a criminal complaint and apply for a victim protection order to prevent text messages from coming or to apply for a restraining order as a preliminary disposition by talking in a divorce lawsuit.

◆ Cho In-seop: But if you're ordered to ban access to your husband like this, shouldn't you negotiate an interview if you have a minor child? So what happens to the interview negotiations with this access prohibited?

◇ Woo Jin-seo: Even in the case of victim protection orders, the order says not to approach against the victim's will. Of course, according to the prior disposition, the decision to exchange information related to interview negotiations is stated in the order to prohibit access. Therefore, you have to exchange information related to interview negotiations. However, if the child is too young to accompany the victim to the underage interview negotiations or if the assault or intimidation is too severe to communicate, you may ask for the use of the interview negotiation center.

◆ Cho In-seop: Yes, so to summarize the contents of the consultation so far, if you have been treated badly by your mother-in-law, you can claim divorce and alimony on trial. Now you're under constant threat from your husband. This can now be reflected in the alimony amount, and furthermore, it can be actively protected through criminal complaints and victim protection orders. And in this situation, if you have a minor child and have to negotiate an interview, I have summarized that I would suggest using the interview negotiation center. So far, I've been with Woo Jin-seo, a lawyer at Shinsegae Law Firm.

◇ Woo Jinseo: Thank you.

◆ Cho In-seop: You can listen to Cho In-seop's counseling center again on YouTube and on the website. If you have any questions or suggestions, please leave a message on the consultation board on the website. You can contact Shinsegae-ro, a law firm, separately.